The Day for Lovers... :)

Valentines Day!

......or is it "single awareness day". Every year for many years Valentines Day has been single awareness day for me.. Even when I was in a relationship Valentines Day wasn't anything special it just reminded me of what a selfish jerk  (not bitter) I lived with and how lonely and unhappy I was and how much I needed to make a change.

I made a  change over four years ago and I have never looked back and I have never regretted moving forward with my life.  By letting go of what could have been, I found happiness.

 Over the years I have attempted to date.  The dates were about  as interesting as Obama Care.    I thought I was destined to live a life of raising my daughter and collecting cats.

Until.........This cutie came walking through my door......more about the cutie...later..stay tuned to future post..

Now the pressure sets in Valentines Day..Ive never had someone who actual cares about my happiness which makes me really care about his happiness.  I find myself googling, asking,  and over thinking what is appropriate or inappropriate ( :) ) gifts for a male on Valentines Day. Should I buy chocolate, wine,  lingerie, handcuffs  :), or a magazine subscription???  too much???

This is a wonderful "problem" to have and I am thankful for this problem.

 This is my blog of the day. With Love, Bamaslammer

Humpty Dumpty Sat On a Wall...

At my daughter's school each week the school  has a theme of learning. A few weeks ago the theme of learning was "Nursery Rhymes".  I knew "Nursery Rhyme" week would provide me with lots of laughs. My daughter already sings to the top of her lungs songs she makes up. This is my daughter's interpretation of Humpty Dumpty. Prepare to be wowed...

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall... (yes, he did.... good so far)
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall...(yes, he did....good so far)
Humpty Dumpty broke his legs and his neck..( ummm.. don't quiet remember this...Neck???)
AND...........

HE LIVED...

This is my daughter's interpretation of Humpty Dumpty. I am proud that Humpty lived.  If this was me retelling Humpty Dumpty he would have not lived. I would  have said his Mom told him not to climb on the wall. He disobeyed and his mom and  fell off the wall and died. I am proud she has not inherited my dark sense of humor and is not completely damaged from me as her mom.

This is my blog of the day. With Love, Bamaslammer.

Learning to live again is killing me....

Really  killing me......I am trying to get my feet wet and possibly start dating again. I forgot what a pain in the ass it is to date. I miss the comfort of a relationship i.e. NO SPANX. 

Yes, Spanx was my best friend after having my daughter. I will never forget trying to put on a Spanx a month after I had my baby. I had a lunch date with some friends of mine who wanted to see my baby. I wanted to pretend that I was 60 lbs less than I was at that time. I guess I thought Spanx would magically take off all 60 lbs.  I remember vividly laying on the bed trying to get that Spanx on. What a freakin' workout. I was bending my body in ways I don't think it has been bent before including my young, fun, single days.  I also remember sweating like I had entered hell. Maybe that is what hell is all the "fun" women are trying to put on a dang Spanx.

Well, I made it to my lunch date 30 minutes late with my Spanx on and my baby in carrier in hand.  I learned a valuable lesson that day. If you are planning to wear a Spanx give yourself time to put on the Spanx and fix your make up after sweating it off from trying to pull up that freakin' Spanx.

Young girls take note. This is my blog of the day. With Love, Bamaslammer

Funny Facebook Post of the Week

My friend, Chris from high school, Is hands down the greatest Facebook Post writer ever.... I will be sharing his post with you because he and his post are Awesome. I do get mad that I didn't think of the post myself....

 Chris's Post----"Just farted in my cats face now Sarah McLachlan is singing outside my bedroom window".

Thank you, Chris !!!!!!!!!!!!! This is my blog of the day! With Love, Bamaslammer

TMI..Maybe?

I love to read funny things on Facebook.. Sometimes I am really surprised by what people post or say... This is a guy I sort of  know. We went to high school together. We have some friends in common. That is about it. I think he is nice and has a good sense of humor. He was instant messaging me one day and he tells me this... Did I mention... I "think" we went to high school together. We've never had a  real conversation...

 My facebook friend says-----"I'm Really getting out there and meeting people. Feel kinda slutty sometimes. Different dates every week. But i seem to have a short attention Span".

Is it wrong that it completly grossed me out..
This will be a new feature of my blog
I thought it was funny... This is my blog of the day, With Love, Bamaslammer.

Teresa, Teresa, Teresa......

Teresa, Teresa, Teresa... she is taking the drama thing just a little to far. Don't you think? The best part is they all, the other people on the show take her seriously.  I really think I need to call Melissa and Jacquelin and advise them.  They could use a friend or two about now.

One thing about being a special education teacher is you learn a few tricks along away. One of those tricks is to not engage with the "bully". If you don't fight back they move on to another person. A "bully" is always looking for a fight.

Hopefully,  Teresa will move on from the ladies on the show and call out her cheating, lying, and abusive husband. Now- that is a show I would watch if she actually grew a pair and said, "I know you cheat on me, I know I married a loser, and you are ugly as sin." I wish that would happen I would be so tuned in. But no, Teresa is a pretend tough girl. If you notice, she always takes the easy way out, by picking on her dumb caste mates who just don't know any better.

I know the housewives like to stir up drama  to guarantee a spot for the next season. I do think you can cause too much drama which leads to the viewing audience being so sick of you and  want you gone. I think this will happen to Teresa.  I think Andy Cohen the creator of the show will think long and hard before he signs Teresa up for another RHONJ. I don't enjoy watching her and her gross husband. I think we have learned more than enough about Teresa and her family.

The show I might tune into is Teresa getting real. Teresa telling the truth, moving out of the house they cant afford, her kids not acting like brats, and Teresa getting a divorce.

There was a time when I couldn't decide if Teresa was an evil genius or an idiot. I have it figured out now and she certainly isn't an evil genius.

This is my blog of the day. With Love, Bamaslammer

Funny Facebook Post

This is not from my friend Chris. This is from a guy that I don't know to well, but his post are funny...

His Post---I'm not sure if this church will ask us to come back. I sang with my fly open, then used the women's restroom.

 

Poor guy..ummm probably will not be invited back.. You scared the blue haired ladies on the front  row.

Better Luck Next Time.

 

This is my blog of the day! With Love, Bamaslammer.